[[How has been]]

Sunday, March 25, 2012

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waliew going to book in again. i guess all my posts are filled with angst because they are done just minutes before the dreaded book in time

Disgusting! haiyooooo. i really would wish there is no need for me to serve in the army lei... Ugh! such a taxing toll on my being as a person.

16km tmr! i think i will feel damn happy after its over. i seem to suck at combat fitness somehow. I STILL CANT PASS THE LOW WALL DUDE. ugh. but i should be able to. sooooon. somehow. doesnt make sense. less fit people than me are able to. it must be the technique.

Damn sian. HAISH. then still got the sadded stuff. waliew. why am i still sad. why why why why why. so many whys.

POP in 2 weeks. not really that looking forward to it cos i doubt the life after POP will be any much better... i seem to live in the future. somehow. cos the feelings go based on my prediction of the future. Like its easier at the end of the route march cos kinda like less to go. rather than at the start. i keep dying at start of route marches. the weight of the extra kilometers are toooo heavyyy.

What else? uni apps. oh right. i applied law and dentistry. in that order. heck it lah. i wanna go overseas now i feel. study something fun. but i bet my thinking will change again. somewhere in the near future. this state of mind is too tainted by the sianness of the army. it is not who i am. or maybe it is myself in a transient state. hello future me. what say you of this post?

ugh. need go eat lerh. booook innnnn. sadface sadface. STILL! i think life will be good after monday :D something to look forward to.

[[I wrote this at]]*|5:13 PM|

Sunday, March 18, 2012

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hullo. me is very sian. cos the time is 1616. and book in time is 1745. that = insta sian. wadehellllll.

haish. ohwell field camp and live grenade throw is over. alot of shit in those, but less than expected so allswell.

ugh lah. wth wth wth wth wth wth. so max sian max sian. i cant take it animoar. army is so mindlessssss. I kinda dont wanna be mindless.

hope my injuries heal, hope i do well in ippt and soc. hope that hope will come true, that hope will suffice. that i do not die.im growing oldddd. im 19 this year. i dont wanna be 19. i wanna be 14, when i first started this blogggg. yucks. or even younger.

future is so uncertain. hate it. i wanna live in a nice controlled life. with the option to leave it occasionally as and when i please. i wanna live a peaceful life. a easy life. wheres my easy life!

in as much as i would like to do nothing, i think i should do something. but like shit.

i wanna sleep, wanna stone, wanna read, wanna eat, wanna dance, wanna run, wanna do whatever i wanna do. wheres my freedom. oh my freedomzzzz. shit i sound crazy. oi nick heng dont read hor. fatshit.

bawling like a shit. half hour to book in. ohwells. ohwells. 3 more weeks to pop. then what? another 9 months in ocs? or 5 months in scs? thought of it is enough to sian diaoooooo. but i guess the day by day thing works. but the day by day thing is so tedious.

i dont wanna lead an army life. i just wanna lead a baby life.

[[I wrote this at]]*|4:15 PM|

Friday, March 2, 2012

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helloooo world.

haish. this week has been confusing. very confusing. and confounding.

[[I wrote this at]]*|10:41 PM|