[[How has been]]

Monday, February 24, 2014

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Cause two can keep a secret if one of them is dead~

[[I wrote this at]]*|5:43 PM|

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While over complicating things makes for tough reading and processing, over simplifying things is even worse.
Stuff like memes are just retarded if anyone hopes to get a serious point across. Of course jest and wit can be displayed, well and good but a couple of one liners never ever present any story in totality for readers to make a good judgement. Too many people take this 'entertainment' too seriously and treat it as like pure fact. Even if it is based on fact it probably leaves out many other facts as well as like, rebuttals.
So, just be lazily entertained, internet audience. Because you probably like me are too lazy to process too long stuff occasionally and like bite-sized nuggets of information but seriously, dont take it as the premise of a intelligent conversation.

[[I wrote this at]]*|9:08 AM|

Saturday, February 22, 2014

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Whoot whoot,
Hi everybody.

Today I would like to be nonsensical and share about how I love the underdog. Not really a underdog that wins in the end but more of one that loses.
I think its terrible romantic in the effort of trying. Knowing that they are probably going to be outmatched yet bravely going into the game. Then during the game/competition/whatever, knowing that they are losing and probably going to lose yet still doing their best.
The mental image is one of say, a boxer taking a trashing from his stronger, more experienced opponent yet refusing to throw the towel, knowing that it is more likely that he will be knocked out yet still throwing punches, just to show that he has not been knocked out yet. Does he fear taking the punch that will cause him to black out? Of course, it is painful. Yet he still hangs in there, still strives, still hopes, even if he does not hope, he still persists despite the overwhelming odds.
Or maybe a chess player looking down at a chess board, seeing no way out. It is clearly a losing game, if the roles were reversed and he were playing the world champion he would still be confident of winning. His position is terrible, he is down a couple of pieces, it looks to be lost, yet it isn't lost, yet. There seems to be no way out, the opponent is smug, gloating in his misery. Yet he still thinks, still racks his brain, still hopes to find a way out of the chains that the opponent has ensnared him in. Refusing to let the opponent have the satisfaction of victory just yet.
Or it could be a couple of moves ago, during the crucial move(s), when he is at a slight disadvantage but the game is still wide open, hinging on any mistake, any slip-up. He feels the pressure, the opponent is pressing, waiting for the gap, waiting for the slight mistake to exploit, to further his advantage. The opponent knows he is better, has quiet confidence. The alarm bells are going off in his head as he discovers that he does not have many options, as each considered move seems to lead only to a deteriorating position. He spots the opponent's traps, like the maw of a monster waiting for him to drop, to slip. He is wondering when will he slip, surely within the next few moves now, he feels the mistake coming. Yet he still makes his move, a considered move, the move that he has 'cleared' as safe to the best of his ability within his time constraints. And he hopes for the best.
Or it could be a sportsperson, up against a person seeded/ranked higher than he. He probably has played, and lost to him before. The opponent is just too good, just stronger, better and faster. 对手太强. He goes into the match hoping to win, expecting a loss, maybe even the team expects him to lose, maybe he is the 'sacrifice'. (im thinking like team indiv sports here like tennis or bowling or something). He still goes to the starting position, refuses to let his nerves show, refuses to let his opponent see his psychological upper hand.
During the match he quickly slips into a deficit. His fears are proven right. His opponent is just too skilled, he is just too inexperienced, too slow. Perhaps on a perfect day and his opponet at his worst he might have a chance, but clearly that is not happening. With each point he concedes his anxiety mounts, would the starting point be the closest he ever got to his opponent? Is it going to be a pure downhill match? No, he doesn't lie down and wait to get steamrollered. He celebrates every point, even not outwardly at least in his heart. Even if it is 1 point for every 3 points of his opponent. It shows him that he is still fighting, still capable of delivering something, that his opponent is not invincible. He will still go down with his head held high and wait for the 'good game' from his opponent, even if it is just a courtesy.

wakakaka. I am happy!

[[I wrote this at]]*|11:25 PM|

Monday, February 17, 2014

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Small talk,

What exactly is it and what is its role?
What does one define as small talk? Like talk about the weather? Like, hey what are you doing?

From wikipedia.

The topics of small talk conversations are generally less important than their social function.^[11] The selected topic usually depends on any pre-existingrelationship between the two people, and the circumstances of the conversation. In either case, someone initiating small talk will tend to choose a topic for which they can assume a shared background knowledge, to prevent the conversation being too one-sided.^[10]

Topics can be summarised as being either direct or indirect.^[12] Direct topics include personal observations such as health or looks. Indirect topics refer to a situational context such as the latest news, or the conditions of the communicative situation. Some topics are considered to be "safe" in most circumstances:^[6]

The weather
Music
Television and films
Sports

The level of detail offered should not overstep the bounds of interpersonal space. When asked, "How are you?" by an acquaintance they do not know well, a person is likely to choose a simple, generalised reply such as, "Fine, thank you." In this circumstance it would probably not be appropriate for them to reply with a list of symptoms of any medical conditions they were suffering from.^[10] To do so would assume a greater degree of familiarity between the two people than is actually the case, and this may create an uncomfortable situation.
Uh huh.

Waliew. Why is how are you considered small talk? I really genuinely want to know how are you and more than fine, thank you. I wanna know like everything you can tel me about you lah. So how, next time i say tell me about your day liao.

My future job? Dunno, just follow. Where is my revelation. Can please have clearer general revelation if not specific revelation. Please.
University course? Same as my future job. Seriously. Just try me lah. Of course I am scared when I say that. But yes, try me. I will do my best.

[[I wrote this at]]*|8:31 PM|

Friday, February 14, 2014

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Amazing is all creation. Or existence if you do not believe in creation.

Is it not marvelous that we only see such a small amounts wavelengths of the electromagnetic spectrum. Listen to such a thin layer of all sound and yet colors and music.

Is it not amazing how little we know about everything. How is this universe in which we live in so complex?

[[I wrote this at]]*|6:44 PM|

Thursday, February 13, 2014

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A little science estranges a man from God. A lot of science brings him back. ~ Francis Bacon

I believe and even assert that science is in no contradiction to God. If there appears to be a contradiction, it is on our perspective and/or human errors.

An all-powerful God has no problems. A less powerful God runs into all sorts of problems, philosophical and otherwise.

God is all-powerful.

[[I wrote this at]]*|11:45 PM|

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

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Id like to go to a park or a beach. Maybe tomorrow I shall.

When got time complain no motivation. When got motivation complain no time. Is it even true motivation if there is no time?

[[I wrote this at]]*|5:09 PM|

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

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Life unemployed is so fun. Apart from the noise in my head that tells me that i should be doing more, doing more, doing more. But i think this is the best way to spend my time in lieu of better alternatives. Working is just not worth it.
Time constraints.

[[I wrote this at]]*|10:30 AM|

Friday, February 7, 2014

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Just read an article on how writing is different from typing. I seem to have not noticed it before but it seems that i type a lot faster than i write. I feel always stuck after i type finish a sentence whereas if i were writing, the next sentence would have already formed during the duration of penning down the sentence.
Such is life.

[[I wrote this at]]*|11:19 PM|

[[Boy]]

Boy re-entered the house after eating his lunch. Just a small affair, hotplate chicken rice at the coffeeshop opposite his house. But then again he usually would not have indulged in such a expensive dish. $4.30 compared to $3 for a normal plate of chicken rice. He mused upon it.
Perhaps getting a job was in order- one cannot possibly have cash outflow without inflow. One would grow broke eventually, it was only logical.
Yet he did not feel like getting a job. What is the point of getting a job when he did not want money. Or rather, perhaps he wanted money, but not enough. For it was true he would rather have more money than less, and be able to eat hotplate chicken rice instead of normal chicken rice. So it was probably that he wanted money less than he wanted to work. Why would he not want to work was the next question then. It wasnt because he disliked labor, he never had a problem with doing hard work. Ok, he conceded inwardly he would rather not do work than do work but the difference was almost negligible. He settled on the time cost that was too much to pay. But really, what else was he doing with his time? Reading books, attempting some writing, relaxing. Perhaps it was really the issue of not wanting money. Perhaps.
Well then, what could he do about it?
The boy knew in his heart what he wanted. He wanted to follow God as the prime objective of his life. The boy feels that he has reasoned it all out. He looks at the people around, all of them chasing different things. Status, he once chased status and was fairly successful. But he reckons that status is less important than God. Indeed contradictory to what the scripture teaches. Not that a high status is wrong, but having a high status as the main aim was wrong. Besides, his status was not that bad.
Money, he is apathetic towards money. Its been years since he last wanted something material badly enough. Now all he requires is an internet connection to a functioning computer and 3 meals a day. Which he had, free of charge, from his family.
All he wanted now was to grow with God. Maybe a soulmate or two. Or more. Ah yes, human interaction would be nice.
There were two voids in his heart. A larger God-shaped void and a smaller wife-shaped void which he required filled. And he would be whole.
He observed that he was fortunate that there were no friend shaped voids or family shaped voids. He was content with what he had for those two places.
He busied himself with the reading of fantasy. Where he could go into places where chivalry lived. Where there was approaching disaster and ruin and he would be the hero, the chosen one, the one with the special innate ability and power to save the world, save the country, save the princess. It made him squirm, slightly, at the romantic bits within such an intriguing tale of adventure. But, he reasoned, every author is probably a romantic at heart. Otherwise he wouldn't be an author. An author's life is not easy.
But it wasnt as if that there were great evils in the world, he thought. No, there were great evils in the world. But none that can be righted with a righteous blow of the sword or a honed shaft between the eyes. Today's problems were too complex, not the stuff a hero of the old with his band of honorable brothers could cleave away into a non-issue. Those battles were not the boy's to fight. At least not today, not this year, he thought.
He always wanted to be a hero.
He thought about love. The most common portrayal of romantic love or rather lust held little attraction. Beauty was attractive in the way that was too basal and natural for him to comprehend. But the thought of wanton loose sex with an attractive person was perpetually losing value. What does one gain or achieve by having sex with a physically attractive person? Is it purely an ingrown instinct that makes it such a desirable thing. Like animals. But unlike animals, he thought, they do not do it to mate, but for pleasure. Why would a pleasurable activity, meaning something that releases endorphines .etc. be placed on a pedestal above other similar activities? That does not make sense, thinks he, why nobody boasts about the number of roller coasters they have ridden and which one he liked best. Or even if he does why is it not a status or anything.
He loved people. Or rather greatly admired them. Throughout his young life he had done enough discernment. Normal people were boring. Normal as in their orientation towards life. Worrying about looks, fussing about gossip, following trends. All activities he considered lesser. Though, he conceded, he was starting to care a little more about looks nowadays. Not the point, he pushed that thought away.
The people that he admired usually had purpose and values he realised. Things that he held dear, thing that he wished he could improve on. Such people always held an allure as possessing something that he actively sought out. He wished he could learn from these people. In someway or another. And these people were so broad, cutting through a wide swathe of society.
He thought about other aims in life, aims that he thought were slightly more worthy of pursuing. There were those that valued experiences, travelling .etc. Those that valued relationships, family. Those that wanted to contribute to society. All logical aims but only valid without a God. But then again, he thought, without a God, nothing would be logical.

[[I wrote this at]]*|9:04 AM|

Monday, February 3, 2014

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Oh of all the things in life taken for granted.

Why i am awake at such timings is due to the fact that ive been bitten by lots of mosquitoes. Something I dont really get at home because i sleep with windows closed. (no air con though). I almost forgot how annoying it is to be kept awake by mosquitoes. Something to be thankful for I guess.

[[I wrote this at]]*|2:21 AM|