[[How has been]]

Wednesday, February 28, 2018

[[On appearances and truth]]

I attended a talk in school. A prof, very concerned about the image of NUS said "perception is more important than the truth". The justification fro this being that when something goes viral, it does damage to the school's reputation and stuff while the truth requires investigation and so on and so forth and when the reputation is already slandered, the damage is done.

Perception is more important than the truth indeed. lmao. So frightened. So afraid of being seen in a bad light. Poor little children. Oh no, what will the public think of me. Oh no, what will the other universities think of me. Oh no, even if I am shit they must not see that I am shit. Oh no, if I am not shit they must not see me as shit. For who cares about what I am, I am what people perceive me. What a joke.

That being said, while I find it incredibly "weak" to be so concerned about perception, I reckon there is a point in that there is no view from nowhere. Or something like there is no objective "shit" and "not shit" to use a colloquial term. If I see NUS as shit for being so afraid, does it make NUS really shit? If NUS's image management makes it look good to visitors, does it mean it is good?

So while I am all for being rather than appearing i.e being good rather than appearing good, following Jesus rather than appearing to follow Jesus, being loving and holy rather than appearing loving and holy, I think there is something to be said for appearances, for appearances do have real effects taken by the people who perceive such appearances. While an "objective good" if it exists, what effect is there? What use is being kind when you are perceived as a tyrant? What use is being loving when the action is seen as unloving?

I think here there is a separation between the virtue (or value) of being such and such in itself (lets not get too heideggerian) and the virtue (or value) of appearing as being such and such. So say I am kind. What value do I gain by being kind? I reckon there'll be some sort of self satisfaction .etc. What value do I gain by being perceived as kind? I reckon some sort of.. idk, people do nice things to you, praise?

It seems to me that the kind of self satisfaction, the kind of inner gains are more important than the external. But then it seems to me that this would only hold if by being kind I mean I think I am being kind. A second condition is that I value my opinion much more than the opinion of others. In this sense, it is not an objective value gained by being kind, but a subjective value gained by perceiving myself as kind. Is there an objective value in being kind when nobody perceives one is kind, even oneself? I reckon when nobody perceives anything, what is kind then? Who or what makes that person kind? Seems absurd.

And here we have the final piece of the puzzle. If there is no perception, there is no truth. What then do most people mean by "truth" is merely something like, the perception they would have if they knew all the relevant facts and were unbiased (strong claim here, im not defending it, i reckon its intuitive enough). So if truth is reducible to such, it would be like, with perfect perception, that which will be perceived.

And in this case, one would be comparing potential perfect perception and actual imperfect perception when one is talking about truth vs appearance. I reckon there will be some cost benefit analysis and so on and so forth for truth vs appearance.

But here, the Christian pulls out God. Ohohohoho. God has perfect perception and is not just a "potential", he is an actual perceiver and whats more, he will act on what he perceives. And thus, to be concerned about truth will be, in some sense, aiming towards God perception. And here I can thus explain why I care significantly less than the average person about how I appear to other people for that which opinion / perception I value more (and hence gain value from more) is God and then, myself (ideally), sometimes the myself takes precedence.

Which is where the 对得起神，对得起自己 kinda might have some roots from. There is just no space for others, especially others whom I do not know well enough to value their perceptions or think their perceptions aren't as valuable as mine (which is actually the vast majority). For those whom I deem their perceptions accurate enough, I do give due consideration to what they explain.

This is kinda freeing in the sense of not being beholden to many things that can be easily deemed trivial (and caring much less about the instrumental "costs" of deeming them trivial). Though I reckon, much work needs to be done on knowing God and uh, I reckon, improving my own perception towards God's. I reckon i've been using I reckon quite abit recently eh.

[[I wrote this at]]*|12:26 AM|

Sunday, February 11, 2018

[[[Perhaps people like me]]]

Perhaps people like me, in small portions.
Bringing, but brief respite from their boredom.
"Interesting!" they murmur, they nod, and say.
The things I tell tickle their thoughts today.

For few keep exotic creatures as pets.
The zoo houses these specimens and lets
Visitors come on day passes to see
The hippopotamus and the monkey

Behind the glass in "natural" enclosures,
Safely distanced between man and within
Nature contained for one's viewing pleasure.

For dogs and cats are those we go home to,
Familiar, domesticated, critters
Until the next trip to the ... zoo

Labels: Attempt

[[I wrote this at]]*|12:44 AM|